Thursday, 19 December 2013


Aku kangen kalian. Kangen banget. 
Banyak yang bilang kalian udah berubah, dan aku berharap itu nggak bener. 
Aku nggak tau harus ngomong apa, tapi aku kangen. Sama ketawa gila kita, sama kerajinan kalian yang kontras banget sama kemalesanku, sama beda pendapat kita. Betapa kalian nggak malu punya temen aneh dan keset tukang telat kayak aku.

Semangat ya, kalian. Semoga dapet pengalaman, prestasi, pelajaran, dan temen-temen baru yang lebih baik disana :)

Though I may fade in your visions, and day by day I'm getting even more blurry until I'm just a ghost living in your memories, and it's getting too late to look back at me, and it gets too hard to remember even a little bit of me, as hopeless or pathetic it may sounds, I'm with you. Always

Saturday, 14 December 2013

Memilih Tinggal

Ditinggalkan bukan pilihan? Siapa bilang?

Ketika orang lain memutuskan untuk pergi, lalu kamu memilih untuk tinggal, itu namanya bukan ditinggalkan. Tapi bertahan.

Ketika orang lain memutuskan untuk pergi dan kamu tetap tinggal dan kamu berpikir bahwa kamu tak punya kuasa sama sekali atas keadaanmu, maka kamu memilih untuk menjadi yang ditinggalkan.

Memilih untuk ditinggalkan.

Wednesday, 4 December 2013

Open Letter To...

We're real people with real hearts, real minds, and real feelings too. We're real people who breathe, think, and get hurt. We got our own opinions and values. We grew up with different individuals around us. Those who we share our thoughts and ideas with. Those who taught us things and told us about matters in life. And they are all different person, each and every one of them. 
You can't just expect us to follow your 'rules' every single time. To agree with all of your opinions and stay silent when you cross over the values we live with. Our ideas of caring and 'togetherness' are different. We ARE different.

By lowering other people's view, and telling people that their decision is some kind of a 'stabbing' action, doesn't make you a better individual. It just shows that you are terribly narrow-minded because you can't accept how others view a problem in some different ways. And to see things diversely is not our fault nor anybody's fault. Each person got opinions because people are entitled to 'em. Everyone got their rights to have opinions that no other person have the right to judge or interrupt, as long as they have rational and reliable reason.

We have our reasons and I think they are rational and liable enough. So liable and rational that people outside of our circumstance who got told the story in the most honest form would understand why we choose what we've chosen back then.

Seeing your indirect tweets only made things worse. Yes, I have a problem with those tweets. I have problems, actually. 

Friday, 15 November 2013

Pijak Sunyi

Rumah ini muram tapi meledak dalam tawa gelisah
Protes dan keluh kesah
Beriringan dengan suara air menerjang atap,
Tanah liat lemah
yang kering, lalu basah lagi.
Gelap. Seperti semua tanah,

Biru pudar bernaung dibawahnya
Kata hujan,
"Jangan berpegang pada kata-kata."
Percayakah yang bernapas didalamnya?
Tanpa sadar dia menghirup dan menghembuskan
kata demi kata.
Meski tak semuanya nyata

Kalimat, frasa, kata
Pijakannya di setiap pagi
Di hari bernama Minggu
Pijakannya setiap waktu
Seperti angin pantai dan daun kelapa
Tak ada yang satu,
tak ada yang satu

Tombol-tombol hitam, nyeri.
Beban jemari
Bergunakah, aku. Aku, aku, aku

Seribu detik berlalu, dan
Lenguhan pasir di ladang senja
Merah sedelima
Sejuta kata membayang, seperti wayang
dibalik layar.

Tapi sunyi.
Melesak ke dalam rongga kosong
Di sini.

Rasanya bagai pasien di ruang dokter
Yang tak bisa menjelaskan di mana
atau bagaimana
Hanya sakit.
Sangat sakit, dan sunyi.

Riuh kata. Dimana-mana
Langit ikut berdebat
Bipolar tapi anggun
Anggun dan bingung
Lagu siren yang melenakan.
Tapi di dalam, sunyi.

Sunyi melesak ke dalam rongga kosong,
memenuhinya dengan gema.
Di sini.
Di hati

Saat kata terbakar mereka tetap bermakna
Saat hati tersiksa mereka tetap percaya
Lebih dalam.
Lebih tragis, dalam sunyi.

Diatas kata-kata sunyi itulah
Dia berpijak.
Dia bernapas.
Dia belajar.

Yang indah tak harus bersuara
Tak harus megah dan berwarna
Tak harus sempurna

Landas pijakan tak harus kuat
Yang penting adalah,
bagaimana caranya,
dan bagaimana caramu berpijak.

c, b.e.w~
15 November 2013

Sunday, 10 November 2013


And meet me there, bundles of flowers,
We wait through the hours of cold
Winter shall howl at the walls,
Tearing down doors of time.

Shelter as we go...

And promise me this:
You’ll wait for me only,
Scared of the lonely arms.

Surface, far below these words

And maybe, just maybe I’ll come home

Who am I, darling to you?
Who am I?
Gonna tell you stories of mine
Who am I?

Who am I, darling for you?
Who am I?
Gonna be a burden in time, lonely
Who am I, to you?

Who am I, darling for you?
Who am I?
Going to be a burden

Who am I, darling to you?
Who am I?

I come alone here
I come alone here

Ben Howard, 2011
Every Kingdom

Saturday, 26 October 2013


Flowers don't know me like trees know wind and winds 
Blows a breeze one way to snow
The flowers around
They're all around


Clouds floating high above the sky
As it is so heavy
Sweeping the light, leaving thoughts empty
And I am both
Worn and weary, ail insanely

Copper dust
Flicking hoarse sound through the cutting
Blade under rust
And you are both
Mad and sorry, ceaselessly crushed

Would chase what is ahead and behind
Would run and deprive rue and sadness
Would climb and see the horizon
Erupt to a glory beyond compare

But we are nothing
Other than unworthy ruins

Ruins who are

~c, b.e.w
October 27th 2013

Friday, 25 October 2013

A Note, A Rant, A Life

Hating life is a constant reminder that you actually live your life....

In the worst state of living. And unfortunately I get that almost everyday because of people around me suddenly act like jerks and I kinda want to give them a square punch on the face or say something really offensive. Like call them bollocks or something.

The thing that I cannot understand is the part when I have to "understand everyone and everything in every situation and why in the world these things happen in the first place", which we know, in the simplest form in society's dictionary as "caring", while "everyone and everything in every situation" that needed to be understood can't be labelled understandable. AT ALL.

Case solved. The world demands you to understand and care and forgivable to others but be hard to yourself. Get that? Harm yourself, eat out your heart, take back your tears and feelings, wreck your brain, bury all your fears, be judgmental to your own feeling,  leave everything you love, tell lies that make people happy but hurt every pore of your sense, crack fake smile, pretend to like what everybody think cool, be someone you're not, dying to be the figure of perfection, because that's okay as long as people happy with that. 

That is what I got. My vision of the world after 15 almost 16  years breathing air and "living".

Like why do we have to care for those who do not bother to even think of what would hurt us and what wouldn't? Why do we have to keep our voices low while they scream, telling us we're not worth it? Why do we have to stop when they told us to stop? Why do we have to be so weak? So damaged?

Why. Do. We. Have. To. Care. So. Much

The nerve. Feels like I'm about to explode. When I read Stephen Chbosky's The Perks of Being A Wallflower, I almost believe.

I mean,
So, I guess we are who we are for a lot of reasons. And maybe we'll never know most of them. But even if we don't have the power to choose where we come from, we can still choose where we go from there. We can still do things. And we can try to feel okay about them."  
- Stephen Chbosky, The Perks of Being A Wallflower

But almost, dude. So close but do not touch.

".. we can try to feel okay about them."

Try to feel okay. Not actually feel okay. Well done, Chbosky.
That is when something hit me. Try to feel okay is still better, and different than pretend to feel okay. Even if it's only the slightest, at least it's real. You give efforts to make them realer. And that is good. Better than loathing the past and live in your illusion.

Excellent, Chbosky.

I started to look up at him, after reading this part:
“It's much easier to not know things sometimes. Things change and friends leave. And life doesn't stop for anybody. I wanted to laugh. Or maybe get mad. Or maybe shrug at how strange everybody was, especially me. I think the idea is that every person has to live for his or her own life and than make the choice to share it with other people. You can't just sit there and put everybody's lives ahead of yours and think that counts as love. You just can't. You have to do things. I'm going to do what I want to do. I'm going to be who I really am. And I'm going to figure out what that is. And we could all sit around and wonder and feel bad about each other and blame a lot of people for what they did or didn't do or what they didn't know. I don't know. I guess there could always be someone to blame. It's just different. Maybe it's good to put things in perspective, but sometimes, I think that the only perspective is to really be there. Because it's okay to feel things. I was really there. And that was enough to make me feel infinite. I feel infinite.”

At that time, there is nothing, like literally nothing I wanted to do more than meeting Charlie, and stare straight to his eyes, then ask him: "How does feeling infinite felt like?"

I bet he would go for hours. Or even days. And I wouldn't mind. Because I like fairytales, and the story about feeling infinite is one for me. Something you want to believe, something you can see floating above you, but you could not reach it.

That alone is a treat. But I want to make it real.

I guess I like it better if I can tell someone in the future that I live my teenage years with freedom and infinity. Without thinking too much before saying something. Without going to the side everyone wanted me to go, instead of choosing my own path. Without being so driven. Without having the need to loathe myself. Without counting lies I tell in a day. Without insecurities. Without holding rage. Without hate and grudge. Without feeling so wrong and out of place.

Like Nick Carraway, I feel within and without.

I can't say that I like it that way or not. But the thing to be alive is experiencing something called "not sure" and "in between". So we can try to feel okay about them, like we can try to feel okay about the life itself, right?
Gatsby believed in the green light, the orgastic future that year by year recedes before us. It eluded us then, but that’s no matter—tomorrow we will run faster, stretch out our arms farther. . . . And then one fine morning—
So we beat on, boats against the current, borne back ceaselessly into the past. 
- The Great Gatsby, F. Scott Fitzgerald

Saturday, 28 September 2013

The World From The Side of The Moon

Hayhay! Selamat pagi menjelang siang! *gaya Nada, temen sekelas yang kalo maju ke depan kelas gak bisa diem kayak kebelet pipis*

Muehehehe. Saya kangen nge-blog demi apa. Kangen banget kayak waktu dulu kelas 8 semester dua pas pada rajin-rajinnya nge-blog dan komen gak pernah sepi, sampe yang gak penting aja jadi bahan gosip berminggu-minggu. Terus waktu gaya bahasa (?)-nya masih alay alay gituuuu :3

Waktu hidup masih terasa mudah.

Saya tu orangnya sering KSBB. Apalagi kalo habis scrolling tumblr atau denger lagu dan nemu yang nyentuh-nyentuh.

Misalnyaaaaa lagu-lagu di albumnya Phillip Phillips <--- ujung-ujungnya Promosi--"

Albumnya judulnya The World From The Side of The Moon, dan rilis sekitar bulan-bulan seginian tahun lalu. Sebenernya telat sih promosinya, telat setahun. Cuma waktu single pertamanya Phillip Phillips yang 'Home' rilis, tak kira bakal dapet recognition di Indonesia seiring berjalannya waktu. Makanya saya tunggu-tunggu, saya pantau terus views video-nya di youtube, eh udah setahun kok baru 22 juta aja yang nonton. Makanya saya memutuskan untuk jor-joran promosinya sampe bikin editan segala. Tapi itu cerita nanti. Sekarang, kalian harus kenalan dulu sama Phillip Phillips.

Jadi, Phillip Phillips atau Phillip LaDon Phillips Jr, adalah pemenang American Idol season 11 yang mencetak rekor dengan coronation song (lagu kemenangan) berpenjualan terbanyak dan dinobatkan sebagai yang terbaik. Jangan heran, soalnya gak kaya American Idol winner lainnya, genre-nya Phillip paling beda. Kalo yang lainnya pop, dia folk. 

Nah lhoooo. Dor. Erika kan cinta banget sama musik folk (malah curhat-_-)

Phillip lahir 20 September 1990, jadi sekarang umurnya sudah 23 tahun. Masmas agak bapak-bapak gitu. Tapi kereeen indie banget gayanya. LOL

Mau liat mukanya? Sana search google.

Gausah deng. Langsung ke MV aja yaaa. Kalian bakal tau yang mana Phillip. Dia yang nyanyi-nyanyi sambil bawa gitar. As if it doesn't obvious enough._.

Saya suka Home. Suka banget malah. Tapi single-nya yang kedua-lah yang bikin saya jatuh cinta. Judulnya Gone Gone Gone. Yang ini  view-nya baru 10 juta-an

Bagus kan lagunyaaaaa???

Nah selain suka lagunya, saya suka video-videonya dia. Hipster banget, tumblr banget. Sampe bikin editan eh :p

Tadinya gini

Jadi gini. Gak jauh beda sih, hehe

Tunggu ada lagi ada lagi. Yang ini berkat Tutorialnya Nada

Pertamanya udah bagus 

Jadi tambah bagus kan? :p

Oke udah stop. Yang penting phillip Phillips keren kaaaaan? Ayo beli albumnya. Follow twitternya juga yaaa @Phillips :D

Dan okeeee sekarang Erika mau makan siang.

Sunday, 8 September 2013


I'm lost. This is bad. I couldn't find myself. This feeling isn't the feeling when you're about to cry. Crying is you plus tears. On contrary, what I feel is me minus something.

Me minus something important.


Wednesday, 4 September 2013

Baru Balik

Hai teman-teman! 

Saya baru balik, hehe. Tadi habis stalk blog-nya Tita sama Esen, mau stalk blog-nya Dewi sama Naomi tapi gak di invite (huaaa) dan blog-nya Agin pasti nggak di update. Sedangkan saya nggak tau blog-nya Putrika apaan.

Selama ini belum pernah cerita tentang SMA yaa?

Waah gimana ya. SMA-nya nggak favorit favorit banget sih. Muehehehe. Ya itu salah saya sendiri juga. Atau memang ada alasan lain kenapa saya nggak masuk di SMA yang sama dengan SMA teman-teman saya. SMA paling favorit se-Jogja lhoo. Hebat ya? --> malah bangga-_-

Berhubung SMA saya bukan ex RSBI, jadilah kami penjurusannya masih pas kelas sebelas alias setahun lagi. Sumpah nglokro banget harus belajar IPS juga dan akuntansi dan segala macemnya itu. Udah gitu gurunya banyak yang gajelas *eh. Mungkin itu pengaruh guru SMP 4  Pakem yang jelas semua kali ya?

Di SMA, saya masuk kelas X4, yang sementara menempati ruang agama Islam karena sekolahnya lagi renovasi. Jadi nggak moving. Nggak tau deh gimana nasib kami setelah renov-nya selesai.

Nah, balik ke guru. Entah nasib sial apa yang menghantui kami, tapi dua guru yang ngajarnya enak malah mau keluar di tahun kami masuk. Ada Pak Karman, guru fisika yang pensiun September ini. Pak Karman ini guru yang rajin banget. Baik, ramah, ngajarnya jelas, tulisannya rapi, dan hafal materi banget. Bener! Nggak butuh buku kalo njelasin fisika di kelas. Dan kalo ngajar beliau pasti bawa minimal spidol tiga warna. Item, biru, merah. Biar kalo gambar sin cos dan semacamnya jelas bedanya. 

Dan you know what? Pak Karman itu pelopor guru yang menghentikan geng dan tawuran di SMA saya. Yah.. SMA saya punya sejarah kelam. Wakakaka. Tapi sekarang udah ganti dari SMA tukang tawuran, jadi SMA tukang meneliti :p. Dan itu semua berkat Pak Karman, yang 32 tahun ngajar di SMA 6. Sedih banget deh besok kalo udah gak ada Pak Karman. Cuma bisa ngarep dan berdoa supaya dapet guru pengganti yang sama baiknya, atau lebih baik :D

Guru kedua adalah Pak Rudi. Lengkapnya Rudi Prakanto. Aduh nggak kuat ngomongin ini. Saya nggak bayangin gimana sedihnya kalo nggak ada lagi pelajaran yang se ditunggu-tunggu pelajaran Pak Rudi. Pak Rudi itu guru terlucu yang pernah saya temui. Guru paling narsis, heboh, gaktau malu, tapi kerreeeen B)) Jadi, pak Rudi tuh guru pelajaran Biologi dan Dasar Penelitian, mapel yang dijamin cuma ada di SMA 6 Jogja. Dan nggak sampe di situ, Pak Rudi ini mewajibkan beberapa lomba karya ilmiah dan Essay yang menjadi sumber nilai mapel DP (bukan Dewi Perssik lho ya, Dasar Penelitian). Jadi, penggagas tagline: "The Research School of Jogja" itu ya Pak Rudi, yang dengan segala ambisinya cuma butuh satu kalimat biar murid-nya ikut lomba. "MPC WJB." Alias, "Mboh piye carane, WAJIB." Gubrak deh.

Dan Pak Rudi ini keluar dari SMA saya karena dipindahtugaskan sebagai Kepala Sekolah di entah sekolah mana. Terus, barulah saya tahu pas upacara Senin kemaren kalo Pak Rudi ini masuk sepuluh besar guru berprestasi di Indonesia. Padahal nek neng kelas senengane narsis--" Ungkapan yang mengatakan orang berprestasi kebanyakan eksentrik itu ternyata benar. Sekolah lain pelajaran Biologi udah sampe materi keberapa, kami malah disuruh buat donat. DONAT. Kalian tau? Iya, itu, donat yang buat dimakan. Emang donat apa lagi? Cuma syaratnya donatnya harus dicampur bahan yang bukan kentang. Kelompok saya kebagian pisang.

Terus gimana dengan pelajaran biologi-nya? Entah. Mungkin harus menunggu.

Nah, itu deh sementara ceritanya. Next time sambung lagi yaaa :)

Friday, 23 August 2013

Gara Gara Tumblr

Yep. Semua gara-gara tumblr.
Yaampun Tuhan aku lagi kegandrungan edit foto nih. Dan semua gara-gara iri ngeliat editan keren-keren di Tumblr.

Dan ada Nadcette yang dengan baik hati mau ngasih tutorial gratis. Duh kecup jauh deh. Btw kalau ada yang mau belajar juga ada di sini.

Nah, dadahhhh :D

Tuesday, 18 June 2013

Tag Dari Nadcette

Jadi ceritanya kena tag si Nadcette yang suaranya kece itu. Dengerin di souncloudnya yaa. Nih link-nya: wehehe, promosi dikit gapapa dong.

Nah, langsung aja, ini peraturan tag-nya:

- Post the rule
- Write 11 things about yourself
- Answer the questions the tagger set to you
- Create 11 questions for those you want to tag
- Choose 11 bloggers to be tagged and link them to the post
- You are not allowed to tag back


1) Cewek pengangguran yang bingung cari sekolah *duh
2) I listen to nearly every covers of my favorite songs
3) Suka nyari musisi indie atau alternative atau country atau folk yang kurang terkenal tapi lagunya bagus
4) Suka bikin kue, tapi keburu habis dimakan sendiri
5) Membaca buku selain buku pelajaran terlalu banyak (referensi dari Ibu)
6) Egois dan keras kepala
7) Sering mendebat orang, nyebelin dah pokoknya
8) Nggak punya makanan favorit karena suka makan apa aja, manis, pedas, asem, asin, nano-nano
9) Dreaming about the future too much that I don't really care about studying anymore. Thank God gue udah insyaf *mudah-mudahan
10) Suka warna cokelat, navy, hijau, ungu, putih, abu-abu

Pertanyaannya Nada:

- Siapa dimana?
- Kenapa kok ngeblog? Apa manfaatnya buat kamu?
- Warna pc mu? Haha
- Umur dooong
- Pengen sukses dibidang apa, dan kenapa?
- Ring, necklace, bracelet, or piercing?
- Tattoos or piercing?
- Punya orang yang menginspirasi? Siapa, dan kenapa?
- Pernah kehabisan bahan buat ngeblog gak? Dan apa yang kamu lakukan kalo lagi kayak gitu?
- Lebih suka di rumah atau jalan-jalan?
- Ngemil atau makan berat? :))

1) Erika di Jogjaaaaa (di Mbesi tepatnya)
2) Ngeblog karena suka dan butuh tempat nyalurin tulisan. Manfaatnya: Dapet temen-temen baru yang keren-keren, belajar hal baru, tau berita terbaru, dan banyak lagi
3) Item .-.
4) Wah, dasar-_- limabelas broo!
5) Jurnalisme, fotografi, property, dan kedokteran. Kenapa? Karena cintaaaa :p
7) Hmmm sulit. *setengah abad kemudian* Piercing waek lah. Bisa dicopot kan? Lagian anting itu sama aja piercing to?
8) Not really. <-- jawaban garing
9) Sering buanget. Yang aku lakukan? Denger lagu, baca apapun (buku, review buku di goodreads, fanfic, curhatan orang, tweet lucu, tweet ngenes, tweet nggak guna, berita online, blog fashion, blog One Direction, website informasi parfum), ngunjungin Online Shop sambil pura-pura shopping barang-barang disainer, dengerin cover lagu, nontonin video-nya John Green, nonton Youtube, nyari-nyari quotes, main Polyvore,  nyuci piring atau masak, dll. Dan biasanya kalo udah gitu dapet inspirasi :D
10) Di rumah. Keluar kalo ada perlu aja. Bukannya nggak suka, tapi agak nggak guna. Kalo jarang jalan kan pas waktu jalan-jalan lebih kerasa serunya.
11) Dua-duanya. Ehehehee

Nge-tag orang? Harusnya nge-tag ya? Nggak usah ya, soalnya gak ada yang bisa di tag. Aku kepengen nangis.

Yaudah, Daah :p

Monday, 17 June 2013

Top Ten On My Book Wishlist

Sharing this because I thought someone would see it and buy me some :p

10. Garden Of Evening Mist by Tan Twang Eng

Now, I certainly want to read it because, 1) It's about mysteries, 2) I love stories involving history, 3) The title is appealing, and 4) The rating on goodreads is superb, 4.07/5 stars.

9. Blind Willow, Sleeping Woman by Haruki Murakami

Paperback Edition

Murakami is one of the most mysterious writer, I think. And I want to read it because the book isn't a novella. It's Murakami's short-story collection. Plus, I love the cover.

8. The Spy Who Jumped Off The Screen by Thomas Caplan 

"A former soldier turned movie star turned spy must stop a catastrophic nuclear weapons deal. " 

Right. An action fiction. What's not to love? Plus from the reviews on Goodreads it's pretty funny (but slow paced, unfortunately). And former US president Bill Clinton got involved? Must be interesting.

7. Gangsta Granny by David Walliams

I've always loved children literature. Especially the funny one like this, with surprise. Here's the synopsis from Goodreads:

Ben is bored beyond belief after he is made to stay at his grandma's house. All she wants to do is to play Scrabble, and eat cabbage soup. But there are two things Ben doesn't know about his grandma: she was once an international jewel thief and she has been plotting to steal the crown jewels. Now she needs Ben's help.

6. The Buddha In The Attic by Julie Otsuka

A novel that tells the story of a group of young women brought from Japan to San Francisco as “picture brides” nearly a century ago. I'm captivated by the togetherness the synopsis offer. So girly but deep in meaning.

5. The Casual Vacancy by J.K. Rowling

I have to admit I want to read it because J.K. Rowling wrote it (except the fact that the synopsis attracted me too). Nearly half of the reader is Potterhead, and most of the fans hoped that the book will have at least a little similarity. But no, not at all. If you hoped so, all you'll get is disappointment. It's nothing like Harry Potter. When Jo said it's not Harry Potter, then it's not. This is a book for adult. End of discussion.

4. Cloud Atlas by David Mitchell

When you visited Kinokuniya and found a book called Cloud Atlas on best-seller list, what would you do? In my case, I'm checking the synopsis, then go straight to Wikipedia to read the plot, then I fell in love. Time-crossing, diaries, old letters, back-and-forth kinda story. A keeper.

3. Hector and The Search for Happiness by François Lelord

Enough with some formulated novels about searching life meanings. Here comes Hector and the Search for Happiness, a novel about a young psychiatrist who found most of his patients have no health problems, just simply unsatisfied with their lives. So he set a journey for himself around the world to find what makes people happy. 

The synopsis gave goosebumps the first time I read it. Philosophy-ish but light. And one of the plus sides is, it's about travelling, searching, which I love.

2. Gone Girl by Gillian Flynn

Really, I want to hug Gillian Flynn and at the same time kill her (but she's too beautiful and genius to die). Just.. I truly want to read Gone Girl that it feels hurt. Amateur detective and whodunnit mystery. I can't resist. Now I'll leave you with the tagline:

Marriage can be a real killer.

1. The Hundred-Year-Old Man Who Climbed Out of the Window and Disappeared by Jonas Jonasson

Time for "The International Best-Selling Sensation", by my now-favorite author (and from one of my favorite countries also, Sweden), Jonas Jonasson. Fiuhh that's surely one long title to write. Like I said, I love love love mysteries. But nothing beats a hilarious, worldwide-affecting mystery-adventure like this one. I WANT IT PLEASE BUY ME ONE. 

All of the books above haven't translated to Indonesian, and they're very very expensive.

Now, byeee.

Images from:

Top Fifteen On My Playlist

Just want to share it. You might need some fresh new music :p

15. OneRepublic - Stop And Stare 
I like this song. It might be just your ordinary pop song but well, the lyrics represent what I feel nowadays.

14. Gabriela Cilmi - Sweet About Me
Sassy soulful song by a probably unknown singer. For those who feel different.

13. Tanizawa Tomofumi - Kimi Ni Todoke Opening OST
I'm kinda in mood with some oriental music (though I don't know the real title. Or it doesn't have one?  Dunno). The song itself is beautiful, suitable for a car ride. 

12. Kelly Clarkson - Breakaway
Lovely, I promise you. Kelly's vocal plays a big part of the song. Love the meaning

11. Lisa Kelly - If You Believe (Tinkerbell and The Lost Treasure OST)
Soft ear-catching voice combined with some fairytale-ish music for a night listen, who could resist that?

10. Ludwig Van Beethoven - Egmont Overture Op84
LOL. Yes, I listen to the classics a lot. This one is my favorite now, but no classics would replace Vivaldi's The Four Season and Simphony No.9

9. Westlife - Evergreen
My favorite Westlife song would still My Love and Season In The Sun, but I like this too. Rated: Ordinary love pop song but still love it

8. The Wanted - I Found You
OMG Directioners would kill me *hide*. I'm not betraying, I just... well, I found this song entertaining. Sorry 1D boys..

7. Robert Palmer - Every Kinda People
Being someone who always paying great attention to lyrics of songs I listen to, I fell in love with this song. Check out the lyrics and you'll know why.

6. Bridgit Mendler - All I See Is Gold
Amazing song by Bridgit Mendler. You should listen to the guitar, it's somewhat bittersweet

5. Bridgit Mendler - Ready Or Not
The song included on top 10 of UK chart for weeks. No wonder. It's an easy listening, attention-grabbing song.

4. Kenny Chesney - When The Sun Goes Down
I'm such a country freak, y'know. But not like Tay Swift thingy, mine's more classy (no offense Swifties out there). Mellow song, calming effect.

3. One Direction - Summer Love
Mellow, check. Simple music, check. One Direction's song, check. Beautiful voices, check. Rich lyrics, check. Favorite. Case closed.

2. Demi Lovato - You're My Only Shorty ft. Iyaz
Fun song! Remind me of beach and bungalows

1. Emeli Sande -  River
Our Version of Events by Emeli Sande is certainly one of the best albums of 2012. You can't hate it, guaranteed.

Such a random list, but yeah.

Wednesday, 12 June 2013

Butuh Nge-Share Ini, Urgent. Butuh Ketenangan

Assalamualaikum :)

Now, what is wrong with the name Israeli Defense Force?

Namanya bro, namanyaaa. Israeli. Defense. Force.
Defense ya? Sebentar tak cari artinya.



  1. The action of defending from or resisting attack.
  2. Attempted justification or vindication of something: "he spoke in defense of a disciplined approach".

Action of depending from or resisting attack. Sebuah langkah atau perlakuan dalam melindungi dari serangan. Maaf, tapi ini nonsense. Israel melindungi dari serangan? Enggak maaf. Ini bukan masalah agama yaa. Jangan salah paham, aku nggak se narrow minded itu kok ;) Tapi ini masalah kemanusiaan. Israel yang diserang Palestina? Gak masuk akal -_- Mau bukti?

Kalo kalian tanya aku percaya teori konspirasi atau enggak? Ya, aku percaya. Karena aku mau buka mata. Mungkin agak kasar, tapi... konspirasi ada dimana-mana, tujuannya macem-macem. Yah, aku cuma bisa bilang, kalian yang enggak percaya mungkin cuma pura-pura nggak peduli, menutup mata, atau punya alergi akut untuk sekadar berpikir. There are too many clues, don't be so innocent. That won't help you. Hehe

Yang penting, percaya sama Tuhan. Kita punya Tuhan. Selama kita punya Tuhan, percaya aja kalo kita aman, dalam lindungan-Nya. Yang membedakan kita sama mereka, kita lebih terhormat karena punya iman. 

Okeee... aku sebenernya takut nge-post ini. Soalnya, kalian tau gak tentang Edward Snowden? Atau malah baru denger? Gapapa. Soalnya kalo kalian tahu, kalian canggih :p Memang. Soalnya berita-beritanya ditutup-tutupin sihhhh. Tapi ada all over internet kok. 

Pokoknya intinya, apapun yang kita tulis, sms kita, siapa yang kita telepon, apa yang kita bicarakan, ternyata gak cuma kita, lawan bicara kita, sama Tuhan yang tau lhooo. Aku aja shock sampe nyebut nyebut "Astaghfirullah, Mashaa Allah," gitu. 

Tuesday, 11 June 2013

Lima Sentimeter Yang Semakin Jauh, Dan Kabur

Tengoklah sampingmu,
ke jalan sempit dari batu
Yang ditinggalkan sang pionir, waktu
Ada dia yang menunggu

Dia, yang tertawa keras tapi hampa
Dia, yang ingin marah tapi tak bisa
Dia, yang ingin menjadi luar biasa
Dia, yang hanya ingin sama hebat, seperti yang lainnya

Dia, memandang bintang di angkasa
Berkilau putih, sedih, sendirian
Dia, lalu berpikir, "Kita sama."
"Punya teman, tapi merasa kesepian."

Dia, yang berkata, "Berjuanglah."
Tapi untuk dirinya sendiripun, bingung menentukan arah
Dia, yang berjalan dalam bayangan,
Bertanya-tanya "Siapa aku gerangan?"

Dia yang bersinar bagai lilin dalam gelap
Hampir mati, tapi ingin tetap hidup juga
Dia yang jarang tidur lelap
Karena tak tahu mana lagi yang mimpi ataupun nyata

Tengoklah dia,
Melempar batu, menunggu
Dia murung tapi tertawa
Bisu tapi berlagu

Begitu palsu
Terlalu pilu

Dia, yang menghindar dari lampu sorot
Dia, yang merapat ke sudut ruangan
Dia, yang berdiri paling belakang
Dia, yang berusaha untuk membangun jalan,
kembali ke dunianya yang tanpa kepalsuan

Lima sentimeter itu berubah kelabu, kusam dan berdesir seperti musim dingin
Menjauh, menjauh, dan kabur seiring berjalannya waktu

Dia, yang sekarang bangkit dari duduknya dan mencari jawaban,
"Kapan musim semi itu datang?"
Lalu berlari, kembali ke jalan beraspal,
menyongsong cahaya...

What Is It?

What's so haunting about death? Is it the dark aura when someone mention it? Is it the frightening feeling it leaves? Or the uncertain position of our lives? 

Is it because people afraid of hell? Or hoping for heaven?

Or they're afraid of nonexistence? 

Maybe they're afraid of unknown condition they would face?

I'm afraid. Afraid of a lot of things. But I finally admit it. 

I'm afraid to die.

No, not now. I'm not ready yet.

Sunday, 9 June 2013

Kerang Sakura

The perfectly sculptured world of Inka Barriasta, a promising, on the rise young novelist on her mid-twenties suddenly knocked down by a terrible truth: She suffered a very rare deviation in her brain, making her memorized reality mixed with her imagination. With the encouragement from her writer pal - turned - psychiatrist Peter Bailey, she returned to her homeland from Kyoto, Japan, only to face a haunting question which could only be answered by remembering the right past. "Why were you even leave this place?"

Back to her old house with two small rooms, and a walk at the beach every morning and eve, Inka met Hanum, a mature nine years old girl, who didn't know anything about daydreams and fairytales. She spoke rationally and included facts, though she loved literature.

One day they came across an argument from which they decided to trap everyone at the village to act like stories they've read. Slowly, the adventure starts, boiled to heat, while Inka find her way to her past and her old wounds actually never recovered. Both of Inka and Hanum need time to realize that frequently, facts are  even more peculiar than fiction.

"You have to shake their hands hello before finally leave and say your goodbyes."

Heeeeey, aku lagi nulis cerita nih. rencananya, rencananya lhoo mau diterbitin. Gimana menurut kalian sinopsisnya? Penasaran gak? Kira-kira bakal bagus gak? :p

Mihihi. Sebenernya udah kepengen nulis novel dari lama. Cuma ya gitu baru ada waktu, terus baru ada ide. Jadi gimana? Comment below!

Thursday, 30 May 2013

Sedikit Percikan Cahaya

"Tempat peristirahatan Jill menghadap ke lembah. Daerah perbukitan di seberangnya dihiasi sapuan maskara berupa pohon-pohon pinus yang tumbuh di lereng-lerengnya, dan lembah kehijauan yang terhampar di bawahnya dibayangi selimut kabut tebal keperakan. 

Sementara sang pendeta melanjutkan upacara, Robin melangkah maju untuk menebarkan segenggam tanah di atas peti jenazah istrinya. Aku memalingkan wajah dan dengan mata berkaca-kaca memerhatikan batu-batu nisan di sekitar kami. Putra yang berbakti. Ayah dan kakek. Putri tunggal terkasih. Istri dan ibu tercinta. Kakak perempuan. Istri. Ibu. Ibu. 

Dalam kematian, kita tidak digambarkan oleh profesi kita maupun apa yang kita lakukan, tapi oleh apa arti diri kita bagi mereka yang dekat dengan kita.

Betapa kita mencintai dan balas dicintai."

Untuk Diingat
"Semua ada akhirnya, umat manusia bagai rumput."

Dikutip dari: I Don't Know How She Does It, oleh Allison Pearson, halaman 306, dari sudut pandang Katharine Reddy.

Wednesday, 29 May 2013

Ada Beberapa Posting Yang Gak Bisa Dikasih Judul, Ini Salah Satunya

Aku, yang suka sok hebat depan temen-temen

Aku, yang suka sok berani, sok pinter

Aku, yang suka sok segala macem.

Aku yang sok.

Aku males sebenernya jadi aku. Sok tau. Banget. Sok Bisa. Sok tegar. Sok Tertindas. Sok alim. Sok suci. Sok baik. Sok ngerti keadaan orang lain. Sok ngerti gimana rasanya gini, gimana rasanya gitu. Sok dewasa. Sok lucu. Sok beda sama yang lain. Sok unik. Sok tobat kayak sekarang.

Sok merupakan bentuk kepura-puraan. Tapi gimana kalo emang aku ditakdirkan jadi sok? Aku nggak pura-pura jadi sok, tapi sok itu sama dengan pura-pura. Merasa paling.

Jadi selama ini aku hidup tuh ngapain?

Kalo ada yang bisa jawab aku hidup itu ngapain, kenapa masih ada yang mau main, ketawa, nangis bareng aku, kalian bener-bener Einstein.

Thursday, 16 May 2013

It Happened, So Remember It

This has been one crazy year. There's so much - too much things we did together. So much that I can't remember how it felt going to bathroom alone, eat at the canteen alone, reading at the library alone, even laughing alone.

We started nothing back then, And for each other at that time, which feels like a long time ago, like once upon a time, the others were just unfamiliar faces we would see for the next three years, wandering on the corridor, sitting in the classes, bragging about how life has been too cruel to let the teachers give them those home works.

But it's not like that. Not at all.

Without you knowing, they've become one important part of this short life we have, and then this reality stick on your brain like a glue. They're your life.

These three years are wonderful, shitty, boring, but beautiful at the same time. Slowly, we were bound together, mended, and when everything turned out this right, finally it's the time for us lift our faces to see the future, saying goodbyes. Leaving.

We're not heartless so we feel this sting when we actually had to leave. Remember the good times. 

Somehow time gives us something to learnt, that if we stay like this together, we wouldn't appreciate every single time we spent, we would be an old face to one another, we would be irritating, we would be ungrateful. This is time's job, to makes us learn that sometimes things are better be ended. If we stay like this then that strong word, 'memories', wouldn't be found. There's no memories. Isn't that creepy?

"Nothing lasts forever, forever is a lie. All we had is between hello and goodbye," they said. And slowly, very slow until you don't even feel it, the future is now and now is the past. That's how life works.

I've learned much. I can't stated it one by one. Now that we have to go to different directions, (not one direction) I have to say that I will try to remember all of you, dearly. And I'll say that you will be greatly missed. You, my friends, once, were my life. Were? Yea, we have to move forward.

But out of all that, SMILE! So we can live our life out loud while we can. So we can remember.

Don't cry because it ends,
Smile, because it happened. 

One who grateful being your friend,


Wednesday, 15 May 2013

Atau Gimana Kalo...

Akhir-akhir ini saya sering bertanya-tanya siapa yang dengan jenius dan rendah hatinya menciptakan situs semacam blogger dan tumblr. Karena kedua situs itu amat keren dan menawan dan ajib dan kece dan addicting dan unyu dan bikin hepi (?)

Maksud saya, apa jadinya kalo saya gak pernah nemu kata-kata dalem dan jenius kayak gini (?):

Atau kalo saya nggak pernah nemu foto-foto One Direction yang kece kayak gini :

Atau kalo seumur hidup saya nggak tau ada rumah dengan interior vintage yang menawan kayak gini:

Atau kalo saya nggak nemu foto kata-kata unyu kayak yang dibawah ini:

Dan atau yang terakhir, gimana kalo saya nggak pernah nemu foto makanan, bunga, atau makanan ples bunga kayak yang ini:

Sedih buanget kan? Nah makanya bersyukurlah jika kalian mempunyai blog atau tumblr. Karena mereka telah mengisi hidup kita dengan keindahan dan kasih sayang. Ya kan?

Oke. Gue udah mulai gila. Pamit ya cemaaan.

Erika (kali ini tanpa Mademoiselle, soalnya lagi rendah hati)

Monday, 13 May 2013

Of The Days (1)

Song of The Day: Vanessa Carlton - Heroes and Thieves (akustikan, tumben Vanessa Carlton gak pake orkestra)

Movie of The Day: Iron Man 3 dooong

Book of The Day: Scones and Sensibility by Lindsey Eland (bagus banget covernya)

Quote of The Day:  J.D. SalingerThe Catcher in the Rye

“What really knocks me out is a book that, when you're all done reading it, you wish the author that wrote it was a terrific friend of yours and you could call him up on the phone whenever you felt like it. That doesn't happen much, though.” 

Place of The Day: Cascade Lakes, Bend, Oregon

Scones and Sensibility

Photo: sunset on Oregon lake
Cascade Lakes, Oregon